Last night, I had the chance to hookup with a friend I had benefits with before I started dating. However, I couldn’t go through with it. He moved in to kiss me and my instinct was the dodge it, so I turned my head. It happened again so I dodged it again. I couldn’t really explain why it felt wrong but it did. Eventually, I decided to just go home.
I’ve kissed him plenty before so what was the big deal? When kissing is done right, I could go for hours without getting bored. But it was different this time.
When I left, I realized the guy I recently dated hadn’t really left my mind. He wanted to stay friends so we still talk here and there on Snapchat. His constant presence through social media made me hesitant. Two of my best friends had even advised me not to be friends with him. Maybe because then I’d be holding out hope that things will eventually work in my favor. And that’s exactly what I’ve been doing. Staying friends in hope that he changes his mind and will want a relationship with me. Definitely not something I should do or have ever done. It someone I knew was in the same predicament, I’d tell them to cut their losses and move on.But I can’t see myself cutting him off. So what exactly should I do?
My lingering thoughts of him made me feel like hooking up was wrong. It made no sense. He’s the one that called things off. I’m single and shouldn’t feel guilty yet I did. I should be carefree and have the emotional freedom to do as I please.
Your twenties are all about having fun. Being single, going to parties, hooking up, the time for you to make crazy memories with your friends. The ones you’ll look back at one day and think, “Wow, that was a crazy night!”
I would love to be that person. The one that goes out to parties every weekend, stay up and out late, have a string of hookups. Maybe go clubbing or bar hopping, meet hordes of new people and befriend them. You know, have an exciting and adventurous life.
Sadly, I’m more of a bookworm that would rather stay in, watch a movie or read a book, and cuddle with my pup.
Do guys like the boring girls? Because I’m definitely boring. Not that having a boyfriend/girlfriend is vital factor in life. But I can’t deny that having someone to share experiences with would be nice.
And sure, I’m not always so boring. I like parties here and there but after two or three hours, I’m ready for the excitement to end. It’s the nights spent with close friends just hanging out somewhere or even parking in an empty lot, just talking or enjoying the silence together that I’ll never get weary of.
Don’t be mistaken though, I’m always up for an adventure. As long as it’s not going to kill me, get me arrested or severely injured, I’m down for anything.
I’ve always been the type to be more introvert than extroverted. Except there will be occasions where I feel the need to go out and socialize. While I enjoy my alone time, my biggest fear is loneliness. I think it’s important to have a healthy balance of both, especially in your twenties when life starts getting more exciting. Some nights, you should party it up and others should be spent in, relaxing. There’s nothing more important than enjoying your own company but it’s vital to also enjoy the company of others.
We weren’t born to be alone forever. Why do you think there’s so many people on this planet? I’ll tell you why. It’s so we can leave our mark on as many people as possible and allow them to do the same. Life should be shared and celebrated with the best people possible. So cheers to a life full of fun, serenity, and happiness!